Things for New York Giants fans are about to get way more fun. Laughing at the Dallas Cowboys' expense is something Big Blue Nation doesn't take lightly. It helps that Jerry Jones is an endless fountain, spitting laughable quotes, terrible decisions, and incomprehensible delusions.
His latest act is whatever is going on with Micah Parsons. It's been tough to follow. The 26-year-old four-time Pro Bowl and two-time All-Pro is looking for a contract extension. Not just any extension — a very expensive one. Like resetting the market expensive. Jones feels like the best way to get this done is to bypass Parsons' agent and drag this out until both sides want absolutely nothing to do with one another.
Related: Latest Cowboys delusion is so bad it couldn't convince a fish to swim
Well, mission accomplished. Per Micah Parsons, the superstar pass rusher has requested a trade. And while the handling of all of this is objectively hilarious and ridiculous, apparently it's not just Giants fans who are having fun with the extravaganza. According to Schultz, one NFC East executive texted him, “lmao I love this.”
NFC East executive (totally not Joe Schoen) is every Giants fan right now
The ever media-hungry owner must have unlimited feet, because the number of times he’s shot himself in one (even just this offseason) would suggest exactly that.
It's honestly hilarious, and it's nice to know that there's an executive in the NFC East (maybe even in Dallas) who finds this just as funny as we common folk.
At this point, it’s hard to tell if this is a real standoff or just another episode of Jerry Jones vs. basic contract etiquette. Parsons asked for what he’s earned. The Cowboys responded by ignoring his agent, leaking fake injury jabs to the media, and pretending a conversation from March counts as negotiation.
Somewhere in all of this, the best player on the team formally asked out. And somehow, that’s not even the most embarrassing part. You’d think losing DeMarcus Lawrence and ticking off Trevon Diggs would be enough to kickstart some self-awareness. But here we are, another day, another completely avoidable meltdown.
Honestly, only Jerry Jones could make Joe Schoen look like Executive of the Year. And for that, Giants fans should probably send him a thank-you fruit basket. Maybe toss in a burner phone for Parsons while they’re at it. Somewhere, every NFC East exec is laughing at this mess.